Single Mothers Bitter.....Or Just Fed Up with Disappointment

Single mothers are expected to endure everything while working, raising children, and holding down the house. People don't seem to care because they view single mothers as irresponsible or stupid for not picking the perfect man. Nobody goes out and chose a deadbeat on purpose. Nobody goes out and deliberately chose a man that is unworthy unless they are suffering from mental health problems. "You picked the wrong man, you had children too young, you put yourself in this situation", is a constant reminder from people that think they are in positions to discipline single mothers.

Many times, the mother never had positive examples of what a father is suppose to be. In many urban communities, the father is absent or he is in the home abusing the mother mentally and physically. Another example is a working father that comes homes and isolates himself from his family. Maybe he's too tired to engage and would rather watch sports and hide in a man cave. It's hard to understand what a man is suppose to do and how a real man is suppose to act if you haven't seen many positive examples in your childhood.

I take full responsible and hold myself accountable, but this should not be an excuse for a man to not be responsible.
We have to endure a lot of public backlash and humiliation. This is what most people do, instead of holding both parents responsibility. Like the old chant when I was a kid "boys do the dirty work, girls take the blame"

When you label a mother as bitter, especially a single mother, you must ask yourself..... Is she really bitter, or just serious and not playing games with her her life and the life of her offspring? Is she really bitter or has she learned from prior mishaps and mistakes. Is she really bitter, or is she more focused. Is she bitter, or is she holding men accountable for not being responsible men.

Too Depressed To Date

Sometimes depression rules over our life, which include are social life and love life. When living with depression, we may not feel good about our self or have the energy to meet and mingle with new people. Even when we are approached with potential dating mates, we tend to push them to the back of the line. Usually because we look at dating or hanging out with new people as a chore. We have to plan dates, get dressed, groom ourselves and travel to destinations just to meet up. That is too much work and effort for a depressed person. A fun night for a depressed person is reading, listening to music or binge watching NetFlix all night.

Dating takes us our of our comfort zone. When depressed, we usually want to stay home and be isolated. We don't want to text back and forth or get dressed up for a night at the movies. In addition, we already see failure in a person. We already anticipate the relationship not working in our favor. Depression will make you self sabotage or judge a situation before it even gets started. Depression will make us doubt the person we are dating and questions their intentions. So instead of dating and taking a chance, depression will tell you to get rid of the person and ignore every text or call. This is our way of preserving our time, heart and feelings. Instead of hanging out and enjoying a fling or finding a new spouse, our depression will sometimes not allow us to get pass the dating phase. Hard to find true love when your depression eats up all of your energy.

For parents dealing with bullying at school

Bullying is something that many children will have to deal with, whether in elementary school or during their later years. Parents must get active as soon as their children come home complaining about bullying. We as parents cannot just expect the problem to go away or expect the school to resolve issues.

Many bullies are going through things at home and use bullying to get attention and to get out their own anger and rage. Some bullies live in a household full of violence and they believe the best way to handle a problem is to fight physically. Some bullies do not physically fight, but they use intimidation methods such as threatening others and taunting. They will even encourage other children to help them intimidate a child.
Some do it because of jealousy. For example, I've heard of children getting bullied because they were straight A students and other children were envious of their success and the praise they got. Some children will bully others because they are having trouble keeping up with school work. Their way to mask their academic problems is to bully and lash out at other children.

Parents should immediately make the teachers and administrators aware that there is bullying going on in the school. Do not let the problems escalate without talking to staff members and have them document the information. Talk to the staff and let them know what your are concerned about. Come to the school and visit the classrooms and get acquainted with the other children. Arrange a parent conference and get the other parents involved. Child will continue to bully if they think they can get away with it. Do not sweep the problem under the rug. Call the school district speak with supervisors, other administrators or the superintendent. Get restraining orders if the child is causing problems outside of the school. Advocate for your child/children. Do not allow your child to be bullied while getting their education. Bullying has a negative effect on a child's mental health.