Is the polyamorous community based in misogyny?

 

I have come across so many different podcast and reels talking about polyamory and how it is the answer to cheating and holding marriages together. Some women have agreed to indulge in the lifestyle because they are bisexual and want the best of both worlds. Polyamory is a form of ethical or consensual non-monogamy. It involves maintaining committed, intimate, and romantic relationships with more than one person at a time, with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.

 Some people just need variety and have a desire to love more than one person while getting their sexual needs fulfilled by multiple people. Does this benefit everyone involved? Couples have different agendas, rules, and goals for their open relationship. Some date as a V which means that everything is usually separate. Some date as a triangle and everyone involved in connect and have a relationship with each other even if the women only have a platonic relationship.

What does this really mean for women? Women are usually expected to commit and be faithful to the man in these polyamorous relationships, while men are able to explore with new partners and pick whom he want for dates, trips, and nightcaps. Should women commit and to a man that wants to exercise his options while rubbing it all in his partners face? Some view poly relationships as supervised cheating. A woman knows her man will cheat so she wants to screen the other women or take a peak into the other woman's life and give input on how he should entertain the other woman. All of this is rooted in misogyny.  Its sad that some of these men are purposely setting up these arrangements to make a woman feel inferior or like she is in competition with other women to win a man in return. 

The big question is do these women really want to participate in these relationships that allows the man to have additional women and every woman accepts their role? Is this the only way a woman will have a man in her life? Are women in these relationships allowed to have another man friend or sexual partners of the opposite sex? If not, is are these really open relationships or a cheat code for men to entertain other women in peace? These are questions that women need to answer for themselves before they join a couple or allow another person into their relationship.

After watching a podcast on YouTube with a group of women and men having a discussion, the women felt like the men were misogynistic and using the Polyamorous label to be serial daters and sleep with multiple women while disguising their behavior as being open and honest instead of lying. This is not how an open relationship should work. These relationships still come with responsibilities and all parties involved she be honest. Men have are using polyamourous relationships to bring in multiple partners and the real goal is sex.Just like a man going out the cheat is doing it as an escape outlet and the goal is usually sex. This is all rooted in misogyny where the women have to remain modest while a man can play women against each other and disguise it as being in an open relationship. If the relationship is really open, why is the woman expected to commit and not have another man. Why is the woman expected to commit and not sleep with anyone else. Usually women are allowed to sleep with other women and it is usually for the pleasure of the man. 

The cost of living contributing to stress, depression, and anxiety

    As the cost of living continues to rise, more people are working extra side jobs and going back to school to obtain skills for higher pay. Housing cost is on the rise with less people are able to afford homes and some not making enough to rent apartments. More families are moving to more affordable states leaving their old lives behind for better opportunities. For some people, they do not have a support system to just leave, they are forced to stay in their current states and continue to struggle paying high rent. States such as California and New York are very expensive and also overcrowded resulting in people competing for apartments with hundreds of other applicants. This can take it's toll on our mental health. Living paycheck to paycheck in  a country like America is unacceptable. We have enough resources, we pay taxes, and we have the best technology, yet we seem to be behind when it comes to affordable substantial housing.

    Many people are exhausted and overwhelmed which is leading to more people being diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Many are relying on antidepressants to help them cope day to day with the overwhelming cost of living. People are working full-time jobs and side gigs just to survive. They are not living a lavish lifestyle, they are just trying to survive and make a way above water. The cost of living is also keeping people in broken relationships they would never not be in. Many women are staying in abusive relationships because they cannot afford the cost of an apartment. Gas prices are up. Food prices are sky high making it hard for many people to purchase healthy foods and relying on cheap processed foods.

Many young adult will not be able to afford their own housing even after attending college. Low paying jobs require a college degree or a license which means most young adults must obtain a degree or a certification for most jobs. This still does not guarantee they will be able to afford housing. The best option is to get a few room mates or live at home until they are capable of surviving. This affects their mental health and interferes with them adjusting to adult life.

More young adults have dreams of earning social media income instead of pursuing college or regular jobs

     Many teenagers have watched online influencers gain fame, money and notoriety by YouTube ad revenue, sponsorship, affiliate marketing, and selling their own products. Some have went viral on Tiktok or Facebook by posting comedy style videos, cooking tutorials, or even by giving their opinions of celebrity gossip and current events. These are fun ways to make money and even gain fame if that is what you are after, but this also discourages teens from working regular jobs or going to college or joining the military. Some high school age children see people getting rich by having fun and posting online, they may feel like college is some far fetched dream that will take up too much of their free time. Everyone wants instant success and short cuts to fame and fortune. As we move more into the digital world where everything (almost everything) is online within our fingers reach. This is where everyone spends their time, it would make sense to make some money and avoid commuting to work and filling out a bunch of job applications that probably will never call back anyway. However, we must realize and teach our children that everyone is not going to gain instant success and become a big name money making online personality. 

    Going to college, starting a business, or working a regular 9 to 5 job is still something to look forward to and more realistic. We still need doctors, nurses, lawyers, bus drivers, teachers, and retail workers. These jobs may not be for everyone, but neither is going viral and getting rich from a podcast. College is still something to thrive for. It's a place to network, find identity and figure out what you want to to do for the rest of your live. College is about finding long lasting friendships, building lifelong bonds and get prepared for the world outside of our parents nest.

With the high cost of living, just about everyone is looking for a second income or a way to work less and make more money while having more time to play and party.