Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Feminist Theory Men want to raise strong Daughters but marry submissive women

How many men have told their daughters to never depend on a man and focus on their education? How many men have told their daughters to never waste their time on a man unless he's going to marry her and take care of her. I've never heard a father in my community or family tell their daughters to serve a man by being his maid, servant, or submissive wife. Why do men hate the Feminist movement but enstill values in their daughters that would resemble the same Feminist characteristics that men claim to hate.

I've often heard men make comments about their daughters becoming college graduates and never being dependent on anyone. Or men saying that their daughters better not have any babies before college/career.

Even before the Notorious BIG died he rapped the lyrics in his hit song Sky's The Limit :


"If the game shakes me or breaks me
I hope it makes me a better man
Take a better stand
Put money in my moms hand
Get my daughter this college plan, so she don't need no man
Stay far from timid
Only make moves when your heart's in it
And live the phrase Sky's The Limit"


He makes a reference to getting his daughter, whom was a baby at the time, a college grant so she won't need a man. It's quite obvious that the rapper wanted his daughter to be a career orientated woman so that she would not get trapped with a man that she has to rely on.Fathers think this way, and their is nothing wrong with wanting your daughter to have an education and be independent. The same men will talk trash about the women that work hard, have a degree and are in no rush to marry and become a mom/wife. If a father want the best for his daughter, he should want the best for every other woman. Although this song is over 15 years old, the message is still relevant today. Men want their daughters to be Independent, strong, education and self sufficient. You can't expect to raise wise women, but marry weak submissive doormat women that rub your back after you've been out cheating and lying all day.

Monday, October 15, 2018

Polygamy as a sexual Fantasy in the Black Community

Women sharing a man in the community has become acceptable amongst many for years. It is the norm for a man to entertain multiple women, with more women being comfortable with this modern day love triangle. Men are using mind manipulation and control to have their women in pairs. This is modern day polygamy. What is this you might wonder?
This is a man that has convinced two or more women that he is capable of loving them, while sharing his mind, heart, body and soul. These men can manipulate two women into believing they should share him, and in return they both get to have a man. These men are using every fear tactic possible to convince women that they should share a man. They usually tell women that they will be alone if they don't accept modern day polygamy. They also convince women that they will struggle alone if they don't share their men. Some even tell the women that if they have high self esteem and confidence, they can share a man. They brainwash women into thinking that sharing a man makes her a confident strong woman.

Women will fall for the trick. The man will always come out on top. He can have his sexual needs fulfilled by more than one woman. He receives mental support, from more than one women. He is usually the center of attention and gets to enjoy everything in variety. The man is able to manipulate these women and play them against each other at his convenience. These women are expected to give 100% while the man gives whatever he wants at the time. While he has access to more than one woman, the women are in line waiting for attention and love. The women have to wait until he is available, but she is expected to be there around the clock for her man she is sharing. It is all a sexual Fantasy and Fetish for the man in the center of this love triangle.

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

The Advice I wish was Given to Me in My Young Adult Life



There are many things that I wish someone would have told me when I was growing up especially in my young adulthood. I probably would have not taken all the advice, because we as younger people sometimes wanna make mistakes on our own. Our egos can be so fragile that we will not allow anyone to offer guidance or advice until it's too late. Many of us were manipulated by men that were not good for us, or spent to much time at dead end jobs that only made us tired and over stressed.

Advice to my younger sisters:



1.Love yourself first. You must take pride in yourself and let others see that you value yourself. Especially those of the opposite sex. Showing that you value your body, and your safety will force men to treat you with respect. A man should know that you value yourself and your are not just a toy to be played with.


2.Stop chasing love and romance. Love will find you when the time is right. You cannot force a relationship with someone and you cannot make a person love you. The right man will love you and want to be in your company. No need to appear to look desperate. Men can smell desperation and they will use it against you.

3.Be very careful about the friends that you keep. Many friends are not really friends .They are there to use you, abuse you, and demean you. Everyone that plays nice and smile in your face is a real friend. Many people will try to befriend you just to compete with your or to keep you close so they can use you under the disguise that "they got your back"


4.Stop wasting valuable time. Work on things that will improve your life. College, hobbies, classes and time alone for your own mental health. For example, if you work a full time job and have children, you may not have a lot of time. You have to be very particular about who you give your valuable time with. Improve your life for you, whether it's starting a business, learning a skill, or finishing college to obtain a better career.




Men telling single mothers to chose better next time

Why do men always tell women to choose better after lying to lure them in?
Whenever a woman ends up in a bad situation with a man, she is accused of choosing a bad man. Whether the man turns out to be in debt, a deadbeat father, a cheater, or abusive, the woman is usually blamed for the behavior. Or she is simply blamed for not seeing the bad behavior beforehand.

A man will convince a woman that he is faithful, building wealth, a family man and everything else she wants to hear. He will promise her everything that she desires. Men will go through every obstacles to get a woman's undivided attention. Whether he is just looking for sex, a casual girlfriend or a trophy piece to show off. Men will tell lie after lie to convince a woman that he is a Good man. Like the comedian Chris Rock said in a comedy routine years ago, when you first meet a person you are only meeting their representative. You are not meeting the real person. You are meeting a façade. The guy is usually on his best behavior and doing everything he possibly can to please and impress. He will spend money, give compliments, even give her hope for the future. Once the woman let down her guards and allow he man in, his true colors start to show.

Everything is fake. It's all a theatrical act to get a woman to open up her heart or her legs. Then once the woman gives in, she is labeled a fool. When things go down hill the woman is blamed for being stupid or naïve. She is accused of not picking a better man. It's hard to pick a good man when a man is lying about everything and wearing a mask. I always tell women to hold back and be very cautious about whom you get close to. He may appear to be nice and sweet. He will work hard at convincing you that he is a great gentleman. He will convince you that he is a great man with great potential. Men are not going to admit they are only out to get laid and play games. They are not going to tell you that they cheat and have multiple children that they don't support. Their main objective is to convince you that they are the best man for you.

Monday, October 8, 2018

Child Abuse Prevention and why are so Many Abusers Walking Free

This weekend I watched an episode of Iyanla Fix my Life. It was an episode that revealed a young woman that was molested by her Grandfather. The victim told her mother about the abuse, but it was covered up. The abused victim was told as a child, to never reveal what the grandfather had done. The grandfather was able to abuse the young woman and never serve jail time. This is sickening and disturbing. What is more disturbing, is that this story happens very often. Some victims never tell because they live in a paralyzing fear. They fear the victim. If the victim is a child, they will continue to take the abuse because they don't want to challenge an adult.

A child being abused is usually threatened. The abuser will usually tell the child that they will kill the family if the secret is exposed. Children sometimes don't know that the abuse is wrong, because the abuser will convince the child, that the sexual acts or okay. Or the abuser will bribe the child with gifts or money in order to keep the secret and have access to the innocent child.

So many family members have covered up the abuse. Sometimes a mother will not believe the stepfather because the stepfather is the breadwinner and she is afraid to be without the Stepfather. Although the stepfather is abusing the child, the mother may shut it out of her reality. The mother will block out reality and convince her child that the abuse didn't happen. Or the child is sexually abused by an uncle or an older brother and the mom doesn't want the abuser to spend time in prison. As a result, the child is left with permanent scars and years of rumination on the incident The child is left with many years of mental suffering, and may never get the tools that he/she needs to cope. This is traumatizing and the emotional scaring may never be repaired. So many victims not only live in fear for themselves, but they grow and live in fear of the same thing happening to their children. If more families would protect children and stop living by this code of protecting abusers, these abusers would stop harming children. I wish I could see more child abusers on the news getting a life sentence in prison or the death penalty to send out the message, that your life will be ruined if your sexually abuse a child.

Tuesday, October 2, 2018

Black Women supporting Men in Prison (part 2)



Black women in our black families will continue to support for black men in prison regardless of why they are locked up. I've spoken to men personally that spent years in jail, and sadly some will admit that they got the most support while in prison. Momma sending her boys money and packages to make sure they are comfortable behind the walls. I spoke to an old classmate 3 years ago that told me, "the only time I get help is when I'm locked up".

This happens in many black families. Grandmothers neglecting bills in order to send money to her grandson or mothers stretching out money to make sure her precious son in the County jail doesn't have to struggle. Prison is suppose to be uncomfortable, it's suppose to be punishment for crimes. Nobody should get comfortable in prison, but so many black women will ensure they inmate lovers or inmate sons are comfortable There are men living better in jail, then they do outside of jail because the black family spoils men in prison. There are grown men sitting in jail waiting for packages and money so they can eat good and have name brand toiletries.

This is not a good example for our next generation. Children will grow up and believe that life is not so bad behind bars because they saw men in prison receive so much help. When my brother went to prison (over 20 years ago,) he was treated like royalty. Everyone in my family felt sorry for him. They treated him like a victim and made excuses as to why he was arrested. Family members that had never offered any help before, wanted to get his prison address to send him letters and money. After doing a year, he came home and explained that prison wasn't so bad because he had everything he needed while locked up. He was only 17 when he was locked up and bragged about all the money he received and all the letters and cards he received. This is an example of how black women take care of men while locked out.

Large plus size women should never lower their standards to get a date or long term spouse

                           I would advise any plus size woman not to lower her standards to attract a spouse or get a date. Men are speaking...