I would advise any plus size woman not to lower her standards to attract a spouse or get a date. Men are speaking out negatively against plus size women and telling plus size women to stop being picky and get whatever man they can get or they will end up lonely without a companion. Women are being shamed into dating a man not on her financial or education level. If she does not want to date a low wage worker or a man with a criminal record, that is her choice and she should not be shamed because of her weight. It is not easy to land a spouse at any size, so why are plus size women being told to lower stands and accept any man regardless of them not being compatible.
The people that are encouraging overweight women to settle for a man with no resources are usually people that suffer from fat phobia and think large women are beneath them. These are the type of people that think larger people (especially women) are less than human and should be treated as an underclass. I recently read a post on a social media site where a woman stated that fat women are likely to be mistreated by men because fat women suffer from low self esteem and accept any type of treatment. This comment was made due to fat phobia and people believing that large women hate themselves and accept any type of treatment. These types of people believe they are better than large women and that large women should be mistreated. This poster never said that men are wrong for mistreating large women, but her post was basically saying that men are entitled to treat women poorly based on size. This is why I often tell plus size women to be very selective and cautious about who they date because some men actually believe overweight women are beneath them and should be treated like a second class citizen. They believe in using larger women for sex and other perks while not being seen with her in public due to their fat phobia.
Women with low self esteem are not limited to overweight women. Self esteem is not only about your outside looks or weight. Self esteem is developed by how you view yourself as a whole. A woman can build her self esteem by accomplishing goals, having a supportive family, having an education, owning a business, taking care of her mental health ect. I can go on and on about self esteem, but I must say that self esteem is not all about what a person looks like. I believe people that suffer from fat phobia have a weird obsession with overweight women and want overweight people to have low self esteem so it will fit their narrative that overweight people are beneath them.
Thin women, can have low self esteem, but that does not mean they should be treated less than. Women that look like fashion models, instagram models, or regular average women can have low self esteem. My point is no human should be treated in a demeaning manner based on their looks, disabilities, or social class. I have seen too many disrespectful posts about plus size women coming from men and women. Referring to large women as Big Shirley, linebackers, and other degrading names have allowed people that suffer from fat phobia to bond together and use large women as a verbal punching bag. Why? I'll tell you why. These people are similar to children in elementary school that performed low and made terrible grades, so they tried to make a mockery of the children that were excelling in classes by calling them nerds or teachers pet. They feel good when they are degrading someone because they see larger people as less than them and easy targets. Many have been taught it is okay to laugh and mock plus size people. These are people that are lacking in areas of their life, but instead of fixing their own problems and insecurities they use their fat phobic jokes and name calling as a coping method.
I have seen posts of thin people speaking on how large women should feel about themselves or how they view themselves. How can a person that does not live in a large body tell large people how they are supposed to feel about themselves? Large women that feel bad about their appearance, usually feel that way because of discrimination, being mocked by fat phobic people and images put in the media to ridicule plus size people.
Encouraging women to date men out of desperation is dangerous because that is a set up for failure as well as mental abuse. If a man does not want to date a woman because of her size, that is fine, however the mocking, bodyhaming, using large women as a verbal punching bag is never ok.
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