As social media becomes more popular and addictive, more people online gravitate to social media influencers for dating advice, decorating tips, celebrity gossip, and marriage problems. Many influencers grow an audience that behaves like a small cult after hearing the influencers opinions on trending subjects. People began to follow these influencers and hang on to their every word of advice and rely on them to make decisions for them. Even if we enjoy influencers topics and their input on subjects, we must use logic, and take every word with a grain of salt we hear online.
For instance, we have groups like the passport brothers that encourage their followers to avoid women in America (especially black women) and seek submissive women in 3rd world countries overseas. Many of these men are hurt, scorned, and bitter after dating women that would not submit to their needs or wouldn't put their goals and dreams on hold to cater their fragile egos. Many of these men have narcissistic personality traits and are willing to travel out of the country to meet women that will treat them like a delicacy and obey them as if they are royalty. These men believe that going overseas to date or marry women is more convenient because women here in the States have higher standards, are too educated and too independent. So they encourage men to travel for dating and sexual escapades because women here in the states are not desperate enough. These men want women to compete for them by telling us we will end up lonely and die alone. This is a scare tactic that these influencers are using on women to get them to "behave" in a way that makes men feel honored and needed
We also have femininity coaches and woman dating coaches that gain a following then start giving out advice based on what they think their followers want to hear and what is going to keep getting them likes and views for monetary gain. These are women telling other women they should be submissive to men, cater to men, and feminize themselves and soften their behavior to impress men. This thinking is backwards and harmful to women. It is harmful because women are being told to change who they are to land a man. Why should a successful woman with a great career have to downplay her education and qualities to land a man. Why should a woman downplay being a homeowner or a frequent traveler because it will make her look too independent for a man. As women, we should not be told how to submit in ways that make us lessen our own values and beliefs. We should know how to respect, love, and support our spouses without having to play a submissive role when we were not raised to be submissive. As grown women, we should not have to mute ourselves or change our character to make a man feel comfortable while suppressing our thoughts and ideas. This is what these particular influencers are pushing.
These type of influencers are usually not educated coaches and counselors. I do not hear them speaking of having psychology degrees or an education in family/marriage counseling from an accredited school. Many of these women are not married, never have been married but believe they have the secret recipe on how to get a man and keep him happy. These are usually women seeking attention by discipling other women in the presence of men to gain lies. They help men build their self esteem while taunting women are criticising them by saying we are not worthy unless we submit and live as women did in the early 1900s.
I have no advice on how to get or keep a man. I do not believe there is some quick packaging that can be sold to land a man. Even with advice, every man is different and we all connect with people for different unique reasons. We cannot keep allowing influencers to plant seeds in our heads that make us question our beliefs or true values that we should stand on.
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